Urban Kvetch: The Vegetarian Option
The Vegetarian Option
Mr. Parmesan Chicken sitting next to me is served a brownie for dessert and all I get is a piece of cantaloupe and half a grape? I paid the same price for my airplane ticket and yet the s...
Urban Kvetch: Libraries
Libraries
There was a time when Utopian ideals, free love and sticking it to the man were all the rage; when libraries were a place for the free exchange of information and an incubator for ideas. But let’...
Urban Kvetch: Fantasy Football
Fantasy Football
While I’m impressed that you predicted that St. Louis Ram Steven Jackson would score a huge number of imaginary points, I’d really prefer that you shut up. Fantasy football is exactly what it ...
Urban Kvetch: Captcha
Captcha
I want to select my item, submit my mailing address and credit card information and call it a day. I do not want to enter some gibberish code that's impossible to decipher just because some a-holes are...
Urban Kvetch: “. . .”
". . .”
How come all of your emails end in “. . .”? What exactly are you trying to imply when you say that you “love my last name. . .” or “We should hang out…”? Your strategically placed form of punctuation i...
Urban Kvetch: Ethnic Restaurant Demeanor
Ethnic Restaurant Demeanor
During lunch at the taco stand you attempt to impress the white stoner serving second-rate burritos by commenting on how fresh the “awacados” are, with a sly smile. At the sushi rest...
Urban Kvetch: “Mediabistro.com”
Mediabistro.com
Why don't you ask my former intern, the one who used to fetch me lattes, to conduct a behind-the-scenes report on Heeb and fail to disclose in her "report" that she was, in fact, Heeb's former ...
Urban Kvetch: Cupcakes
Cupcakes
Must all our pleasures now be "luxe"? The humble iced cupcake used to give a cheap but satisfying thrill. No more. It's had a grotesque and pricey makeover. Icing's out, replaced by a thick, damp gob ...
Urban Kvetch: Cabining
Cabining
Cabining is like camping, but in little cabins. You separate from nature with paper-thin walls, have somewhere to run to when the animals get aggressive and look like a hero for working the fire pit. ...
Urban Kvetch: The WGA
The WGA
I come from Russian-Jewish stock. I practically have socialism running in my veins. But when, in the wake of a nasty strike, the WGA leadership makes public the names of those who have opted out of the...
Urban Kvetch: The Star’s Producing Partner
The Star's Producing Partner
You grew up with him. Or went to acting class with her. Or were the first dude he met the day before finally getting cast on the show that Changed His Life. But because your name i...
Urban Kvetch: Bad Nuts
Bad Nuts
Once in a while, even when munchin' on, say, a bag of high-end Bazzini cashews, you'll come across a nut that tastes a li'l fruitier than the others. Disgusting. So, who in their right mind would have...
