Nosh Pit: Latkes, Three Ways
I'm sure by now you've hit a holiday party with all sorts of starchy casserole goodness, but don't forget about the Jewish version of hash browns better known as latkes. After all, they're the only good thing a...
Urban Kvetch: Bragging About Your Health
Now that it's cold season, please don't explain how you were "starting to get sick, but fought it off." You fought it off? Do you have so few accomplishments that you need to take credit for your God-...
Stephanie Green: _Cancer Is the New Black_
Meet Stephanie Green, a writer whose privileged life was interrupted by stage II breast cancer at 32. She responded by shopping, botoxing, pill-popping and partying her way through a bilateral mastectomy, recon...
Epic Battle over Traffic Demarcations/Jewish Souls Spirals into Felliniesqe Absurdity
For those who have not been following this present-day "holy war," here's the rundown: The Hasidic community of Williamsburg requested the removal of 14 blocks of bike lane markings, complaining that "the cycli...
Israel, We Will Take Your Heretics
This week, Israel's justice minister announced that Jewish religious law should become "binding law of state," inciting panic among the country's secular majority. We agree with Minister Yaakov Neeman...
Edan: “The Universe’s Answer to Mainstream Rap”
Edan Portnoy is a Jewish rapper, but, lucky for listeners, the former has little to do with the latter. To promote Echo Party, his follow-up to the critically acclaimed Beauty and the Beat, Edan invited me down...
Aliens in Your Office: Adam Busch Talks _Drones_
Buffy the Vampire Slayer fans were horrified when supervillian Warren shot lesbian witch Tara, but that violent murder made for a surprisingly happy ending. Adam Busch and Amber Benson, the actors who played th...
God Announces His Appearance at Heebonism, Palm Springs
(God's Vlog after the jump) Yes, that's right: The big G dash D chimes in on His Christmas Eve plans in this special exclusive for Heebmagazine.com. Make your reservation for Heebonism at the swank Ace Hotel in...
Nosh Pit: Lox Benedict
We imagine those of you who tried the Future issue'sD-I-Y Loxrecipeare burned out on bagels and cream cheese. So here's your brunch alternative for cured fish aficionados: Lox Benedict. BERNAISE HOLLANDAISE SA...
Do Not Fear Zombie Hitler; KGB Made Sure The Fuhrer Wouldn’t Return
Rest easy, Jews. We're officially safe from any undead, vampire or cloned version of the Fuhrer. New reports reveal the Soviets burned his and Eva Braun's bodies and dumped the remains in an East German river i...
Lisa Lampanelli Wishes You A Happy Hannukah
To plug her book, Chocolate, Please, Lisa Lampanelli turns Heeb's Hannukah photo shoot into her last chance to play with big black dildos. "I'm engaged now, man," she says. Since the Queen of Mean is marrying a...
Skullfucker Grills Lefty: Fallout from The Iran Sanctions Bill
Seems some are shocked our most lefty, progressive group is actually supporting those sanctions on Iran instead of the expected reaction: thumb-twiddling and worry over possible effects on the children. Journal...
