Urban Kvetch

May 5, 2010

Pressing Facebook Business You cut me off right in the middle of my story. "Can't talk. Swamped. Will call you later." While waiting patiently by the phone, I log onto Facebook, and what do I see? You! Playing...

Urban Kvetch: Your Inescapable Wedding Photos

May 5, 2010

Your Inescapable Wedding Photos Didn't I make a big deal and celebrate with you after he proposed? Bought you like, five gifts and paid $300 for that ugly dress? Yet now, whenever I want to post a passive-aggr...

Urban Kvetch: My Mean Esthetician

May 5, 2010

My Mean Esthetician Listen, scary facial lady with undefined Eastern European accent, stop yelling at me for having pimples. It's not my fault, okay? No, I don't always wash my face after I stumble home drunk,...

Urban Kvetch: The Chick I Meet Every Morning at the Dog Run

May 5, 2010

The Chick I Meet Every Morning at the Dog Run It's early and cold. You stand next to me at the dog run before I have had the chance to take my first sip of coffee and immediately begin telling me about Muffin ...

Urban Kvetch: Bragging About Your Health

May 5, 2010

Bragging About Your Health Now that it's cold season, please don't explain how you were "starting to get sick, but fought it off." You fought it off? Do you have so few accomplishments that you need to take cr...

Urban Kvetch: “Alternative” Parenting Techniques

May 5, 2010

"Alternative" Parenting Techniques I don't give a shit about your boy's need for "imaginary play." Especially when the little brat spills his organic chocolate milk all over my $200 shoes. Am I at McDonald's P...

Urban Kvetch: “Mediabistro.com”

May 5, 2010

Mediabistro.com Why don't you ask my former intern, the one who used to fetch me lattes, to conduct a behind-the-scenes report on Heeb and fail to disclose in her "report" that she was, in fact, Heeb's former ...

Urban Kvetch: Cupcakes

May 5, 2010

Cupcakes Must all our pleasures now be "luxe"? The humble iced cupcake used to give a cheap but satisfying thrill. No more. It's had a grotesque and pricey makeover. Icing's out, replaced by a thick, damp gob ...

Urban Kvetch: Cabining

May 5, 2010

Cabining Cabining is like camping, but in little cabins. You separate from nature with paper-thin walls, have somewhere to run to when the animals get aggressive and look like a hero for working the fire pit. ...

Urban Kvetch: The WGA

May 5, 2010

The WGA I come from Russian-Jewish stock. I practically have socialism running in my veins. But when, in the wake of a nasty strike, the WGA leadership makes public the names of those who have opted out of the...

Urban Kvetch: The Star’s Producing Partner

May 5, 2010