Artists Invoke Capitalism and/or Marxism to Defend Schorring


Let’s begin by being nice.  Jewdar has long been an advocate of Jewish artists engaging Jewish culture in creative and interesting ways. So we’ll give the folks making 3Weeks the Opera high marks. In classic Romantic fashion, they’ve taken an important episode in our history (the destruction of the Second Temple and Yochanan ben Zakkai’s reestablishing of Yavneh as a Jewish center) and made it into an opera.  In the true spirit of opera, they’ve made it in not just one foreign language, but three.  Solid stuff.  As for the quality of the opera, we have no idea, and even if we saw it, would have no idea, not being remotely interested in, or knowledgeable about, opera.  (although some distant great, great uncle of ours back in Latvia did write a Yiddish opera).    And we wish Yoav Gal, the man behind the opera, nothing but success.


That said, Jewdar has had enough with the schnorring.  Some time ago, we did a favor for Ian Rosenberg, FOJ, by directing Heeb readers to the fundraising campaign for his most recent project.  Since then, we’ve become the go-to guy for any Jewish artist looking to shake out some shekels from the money tree.  Heeb just got this from the 3Weeks people:

If you consider yourself a Marxist then you really should support the arts.  Because the mercantile forces, which dominate our society use the term Art to mean entertainment – just another vehicle to collect money from the people, while numbing our minds with syrupy make-believe. If it weren’t for the camaraderie of people who are striving for a better future, we would all be condemned to an endless diet of pop culture!
So, we need you. Please, be a fine comrade, and support our opera.  
If you consider yourself a Capitalist, however, then you really should support the arts, because philanthropy is the true sign of the moral superiority of Capitalism.  It is through patronage that a free individual can place a value, and choose to support serious cultural, esthetic, endeavors.  Government is too bureaucratic and inefficient, and cannot be relied upon to support a truly daring individual vision.  

So, please put your money to good use.  Support our opera!
We are dead serious about this production, and will make you proud of your support  – whichever direction your ideological convictions may be leaning.

We have already collected three quarters of our kickstarter goal, but still have a little under 2000 to raise in the next five days, to make it to the finish line.
If you already gave, we are so, very grateful, and please forgive our entreaties.

Your contribution is invaluable. In return for your help, we offer you our deepest gratitude (and some truly wonderful thank-you gifts)!  Help us bring our vision to life by giving today.

Many thanks,

Ronit, Ruby, Yoav, and the 3WEEKS cast and crew.


Naturally, this gets kicked to Jewdar.  So here’s our advice to all Jewish artists with their hands out.  Why don’t you all earn you money the old fashioned way, either from a rich uncle, or turning tricks?  In fact,  we’ll write the copy for you:

Dear ________,

If you’re our rich uncle, please give us money, so that we can make our opera/movie/performance art piece symbolizing the objectification of women featuring us, naked, shrinkwrapped, and with a price tag.  


If you’re not our rich uncle, we’ll turn a trick for you, in which, if you’d like, for an additional fee, you can pretend to be our rich uncle.


Trust us, you’re more likely to make your nut, and at the end of the day, at least you’ll feel some sense of pride knowing that one way or the other, you deserved to.


What do you think?

About The Author


The Tel Aviv-born, Milwaukee-bred Jewdar has a bachelors' from the University of Wisconsin, a Masters from NYU, and an Honorable Discharge from the US Army, where he spent two years as an infantryman in the 101st Airborne Division. He's the co-author of "The Big Book of Jewish Conspiracies", the Humor Editor of Heeb Magazine, and a watcher of TV. Smarter than most funny people, funnier than most smart people, he lives on the Lower East Side with his wife and two sons.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

This will close in 0 seconds