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Top Ten Reasons for the Disappearance of the Auschwitz Sign

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Update: The "Arbeit Macht Frei" sign has been recovered. Five men have been detained for the theft and it sounds like they stole it for financial reasons. Though an investigation is underway, it’s still unclear whether these men committed the world’s dumbest heist all on their own or were hired by some rich anti-Semitic weirdo. (Looks like it’s number 5 or 7.)

By now, the whole world knows that the Auschwitz sign has been stolen. While we can’t help but feel that this kind of security lapse wouldn’t have happened while you-know-who was running the place, we’re not going to point fingers. Like many, we’re sure, Jewdar is less interested in how some thieves managed to remove and walk away with the 16-foot long iron sign, than in why. Like with Auschwitz itself, we have, perhaps, no clear answer. But here are a few possibilities:

1. Prank by Cracow UZBTChapter. Before it’s returned, photos of the sign at various international landmarks will be sent to the Auschwitz Museum.

2. Having this sign is totally going to vault theSan Antonio Holocaust MuseumpastHoustonto the top tier of Texas Holocaust museums.

3. Kick-ass addition to suburban Jersey teen’s collection of street signs, including "Sussex Blvd" with the "Sus" crossed out, and one pointing to Buckingham Palace with the "B" turned into an "F."

4. Starry-eyed dreamer played by Kevin Costner, who, believing that "if you build it, they will come," is planning on meticulously reconstructing Auschwitz in his Iowa cornfield.

5. Polish entrepreneur hoping he can convince people his imitation concentration camp tourist trap is the real thing.

6. Repo man finally collecting on 68-year old unpaid bill for sign.

7. Mel Gibson, convinced that without the sign, the whole edifice of the "Holohoax" will collapse.

8. Publicity stunt to highlight addition of new LED sign and scoreboard donated by Pepsico.

9. Jewish tour group who, after serious deliberation, decided that this would be the only way to conclude the "Best March of the Living, ever."

10. Disgruntled staffers at Dachau, upset that theAuschwitz Facebook pagehas more friends than theirs.

What do you think?

About The Author

jewdar
jewdar

The Tel Aviv-born, Milwaukee-bred Jewdar has a bachelors' from the University of Wisconsin, a Masters from NYU, and an Honorable Discharge from the US Army, where he spent two years as an infantryman in the 101st Airborne Division. He's the co-author of "The Big Book of Jewish Conspiracies", the Humor Editor of Heeb Magazine, and a watcher of TV. Smarter than most funny people, funnier than most smart people, he lives on the Lower East Side with his wife and two sons.

47 Responses

  9. jamessmithforum

    Thank You……………………………………………….

    Reply
  11. angelheart

    LOL…
    Reason of 10th make me laught. It’s really great reason. Keep good work, mate.

    Reply
  13. lipan12

    The list is too “old”, i.e. most of those disappearings happened so long before, when there was not the equipment to properly investigate. I dare saying that it was easier to disappear like seventy years ago than it is nowadays (and even nowadays it i

    Reply
  23. pharmade

    Who gives a shit about the sign? We should give a shit about the people!

    Reply
  30. hauntie

    Well this is a very interesting subject and that picture looks totally haunted! I would love to visit Auschwitz on a rainy night and search for
    paranormal activity because that place looks scarier then any of the

    Reply
  31. Anonymous

    I would never have imagined that the Auschwitz sign would disappear. I can’t even begin to imagine who would want this horrible piece of history. It should have stayed where it was.
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    Reply
  32. Anonymous

    This is really sad that people would really steal things like this. This is history and I dont understand why they cannot just leave it alone. They need to get a job or something.

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    Reply
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  35. advenda

    The list is too “old”, i.e. most of those disappearings happened so long before, when there was not the equipment to properly investigate. I dare saying that it was easier to disappear like seventy years ago than it is nowadays (and even nowadays it i

    Reply
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