Since sex and drugs are boring, a group of high school kids in Southern California have found a new way to pass the time: In the tradition of all the classic Jew-bashing festivities (“Throw the Jew Down the Well“, Soldiers tackling each other for “Jew Gold”), a group of about forty kids have invented a new game called “Beat the Jew,” where a single player (“the Jew”) is blindfolded and dropped off in the middle of Highway 111; the other players (“the Nazis”) drive around and try to “catch, tackle and capture” the designated Jew player.

Because the Holocaust just looks like it was so much freaking fun, spoiled shits had to recreate it as a game.

Apparently, this new pastime is gaining popularity with kids all over the Coachella Valley. With no way to shut it down, the distraught head of the high school (“I’m profoundly disappointed,” says Principal Donna Salazar) can’t even punish them as the game doesn’t occur at school, which doesn’t really matter since any appropriate punishment, e.g., a lightning bolt from the sky, is well beyond the powers of a high school principal.

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