The _Heeb_ Last-Minute Father’s Day Guide

Congrats! You managed to get through Mother’s Day relatively unscathed (even if you did walk in on your mom wearing Dreidel Hustler’s gift, yikes!). Well, you’re not out of the woods yet–next up on the obligatory gift-giving holiday calendar: Father’s Day. Instead of buying your dad some terrible tie or mysterious tool, check out what the Heeb staffers plan on giving their father figures this Sunday.

An eight-ounce bottle of Before-You-Go Bathroom Spray, $24.95 at Poo-pourri.

Cock Meat Surprise Cock Bib, $14.99 at Cockbibcrazy.com.

The notorious 1989 Fleer Billy Ripken in near-mint condition, $9 at Bryan’s Card Shop.

Yiddish Proverb Money Clip, $16 at ModernTribe.

A DVD copy of Bickford Schmeckler’s Cool Ideas, $19.99 at Amazon.

A copy of the masterful Night of the Living Jews for $12.50 right here on our site. The uncut version of our strip dreidel video as a DVD extra is worth the price alone.

And remember, no matter what you do, you’ll end up being a disappointment anyway. Happy shopping!

What do you think?

About The Author

The Grand Conspirator

The Grand Conspirator is part of a secret Semitic society that traces its roots to Medieval Salamanca. He will be saying Kaddish for Soupy Sales for the rest of his life.

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