Superman’s Jewish Roots (According To Hizbollah)

Blah blah blah Superman is Jewish. I get it. I’ve heard it before. Frankly, at this point none of us should really give a flying fuck (or at least one that leaps tall buildings in a single bound) about Supes’ semitic bona fides. What was once a mildly amusing ethno-cultural theory has become proprietary tribal chest-beating of the most annoying kind.

I mean, jeez, keep it up with this “Superman is ours” crap and who knows what kind of insane, wrong-headed impressions you might be giving to the sort of people who…oh, uh. Shit:

So let’s just set the record straight, once and for all, yeah? Superman isn’t Jewish. He’s Kryptonian. From the planet Krypton. He worships the red sun Rao. Any incidental similarities to Judaism, Christianity, Zoroastrianism, or Universal Unitarianism are just that – incidental.

What do you think?

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