The Hipster phenomenon’s lockstep adherence to fashion underscores a deeper resonance, namely that between fashion and fascist.

Hipsters are likely too young to remember the 80s Gay Clone, Tom Selleck’s, earlier attempt to resurrect the ‘stache, ostensibly to hide stretchmarks from too many blowjobs.  And while some observers chalked the Clone up to a fetishization of the working man, that explanation circles me back to the fact that Nazis called themselves National Socialists, the most brazen mind fuck of all.

Meanwhile, this cute little Hitler ‘toon takes a novel approach in humanizing Der Fuhrer, for what purpose I know not. Rabid Ultra-Zionists have no doubt already drawn a paranoid parallel between the semiotic Hipster favoring of Kafia-as-accessory and an imagined affinity between Palestine and The Third Reich.

I’ve always found hipsters to be quite sexy, and although my love of the knish will never allow me entry into their man-orexic ranks, I can’t help but theorize that in Auschwitz everybody could squeeze into skinny jeans.

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