Dogma

*If those paparazzi photos from the red carpet are any indication, the rhinestone collar of yesteryear simply won’t do it for today’s fashion hound… or her dog. To meet a growing need, pet designers are creating looks suitable for a full spectrum of canine lifestyles—from hoodies and sweatbands for the energetic terrier in the Hamptons to sunglasses and bikinis for the pampered chihuahua in St. Tropez. But is there anything out there for a nice Jewish dog (or a shiksu contemplating conversion)? Don’t worry, these revolutionary new products will meet the special needs of any M.O.P.s (Members of the Pack).*

Tired of being asked at the Israel Day Parade if everyone can pet your dog? Next time, let the canine express his own rabid Zionism and tell those protestors, “Paws off!” with this *Star of David neckerchief*. “_www.woofandmeowshoppe.com_”:http://www.woofandmeowshoppe.com

We’re not sure what unlikely situation would require these, but there’s probably a Reconstructionist rabbi out there who has the answer. The *pet yarmulke and tallis* come in five different sizes, but only one color (sorry, rainbow not available). “_www.chosencouture.com_”:http://www.chosencouture.com

Lead your dog down the path of righteousness with the *Star of David leash and collar*. And for pets dealing with more complex religious issues, an interfaith collar is also available. “_www.m-o-d-t.com_”:http://www.m-o-d-t.com

Here’s one for the bitches: *Yiddish pet T-shirts* from Rabbi’s Daughters, perfect for every pet personality. Available with “Kvetch”, “Meshuggenah” and “Shayna Punim.” “_www.chosencouture.com_”:http://www.chosencouture.com

These *I.D.F. dog tags* don’t have room for your name and address but the teffilat haderech on the back should be more than enough to get a lost dog safely home… or at least to Israel. “_www.m-o-d-t.com_”:http://www.m-o-d-t.com

If you’re trying to deprive your pets out of actual snacks, do it right with Chewish toys by Copa Judaica. *Kosher bone and bagel squeak toys* for dogs. “_www.chosencouture.com_”:http://www.chosencouture.com

It might not be Bubbe’s chopped liver, but Bowser won’t be able to tell the difference. The KosherPets *Chopped Liver Dinner* isn’t kosher for human consumption, but it apparently meets the dietary standards for animals. “_www.kosherpets.com_”:http://www.kosherpets.com

So sure, your dog is Jewish, but is he a Jewish man? Document this
milestone with a *Bark Mitzvah party package*, complete with an all-meat cake. We’re sure your best friend will appreciate it a hell of a lot more than a doggie bris. “_www.cleosbarkery.com_”:http://www.cleosbarkery.com

What do you think?