New Mossad Recruitment Video Promises Lots Of Coffee, Walking Around Cities, And Looking Like A TV Spy

Do you have what it takes to join one of the word’s most feared and fearsome intelligence services? If this new Mossad recruitment video – put out by the Israel government – is to be believed, you’ll need a skill set that includes:

  • Wearing a suit
  • Sipping a lot of coffee
  • Looking at screens
  • Walking around while looking incredibly conspicuous.

You should also bone up on drone-flying with an elementary schooler – that seems important too.

Maybe there’s some subtle psy-ops suggestive imagery here I’m just not picking up on, but this whole thing feels like one of those daytime commercials urging you to “get your degree in criminal justice.” The clip is in Hebrew (with just enough English thrown in to give it a real sense of international intrigue) but you’ll get the picture easily enough:

According to the JTA:

Throughout [the video], a woman and a man say things like “My job isn’t exactly nine-to-five,” “Life is what you make of it” and “All my friends think I’m in marketing.” Sometimes, the two supposed agents speak in unison and sound like a robot.

…oh, okay.

Should you be tempted to follow this rabbit down its hole, the video links to a multi-lingual Mossad recruitment page replete with stock photos of “technology,” cryptic slogans (“This is my secret – always and forever“) and even a word-cloud for maximum “Corporate retreat, 2003” effect.

screenshot via

screenshot via

Unfortunately, we’ll probably never learn if this type of wide-net online recruitment is an effective method for targeting and training a new generation of Israeli super-spys. That is, at least, not until Steven Spielberg makes a movie about it.

What do you think?

About The Author

Zayin B'Ayin

Heeb's foremost authority

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