Anthony Weiner Alternate Sexting Names: Jewish Edition

By now everyone knows about former congressman/current mayoral candidate/perpetual sext-er Anthony Weiner’s most recent bout of online naughtiness – This time under the (admittedly awesome) nom de porn “Carlos Danger”. And while I can understand Weiner’s use of a fake name for online shenanigans, I can’t help but wonder what made a nice Jewish perv like Anthony pick a name like “Carlos”. Sure, it’s dashing, but I don’t think anyone looks at Weiner and thinks “sensual Latino”.  What’s the matter, Tony? Not enough sexy Semitic pseudonyms out there for you?

So, next time Weiner poorly covers his sexting tracks (because – who are we kidding? – of course there’ll be a “next time”), he should feel free to use any one of these decidedly Jewish sexting names:

Chayim Schmeckle









Morty Cockendbaltz











Shlomo Tushyschtupper










Tevye Schmegma 










Yossi Schlong












Shmuel Knish-licker  









David Dangleputz














Yitz Schvancepoker 













and of course…

Anthony Weener 

Anthony Weiner

What do you think?

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11 Responses

  1. Yid Vicious
    Joshua Neuman

    Nice work, comrade. Though I think “Norman Fell” would have been apt given his penchant for breaking the fourth wall.

  2. Victor

    The Carlos Danger moniker was stolen from old Fireside Theater schtick. I doubt he’s that creative.

  3. Len

    Is his name, Anthony Weiner, a real name? Wasn’t he named Sheldon Weiner at birth?

  4. Michelle

    Very, very funny. You question “Carlos” as not being semitic enough; Anthony is such a nice Jewish name? Does he have a sister named Isabella?


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