Since his arrest for running a Ponzi scheme in December 2008, 70-year-old Bernard Madoff has suffered everything from death threats to small penis accusations. Well, it seems the stresses of being most the hated person in The Land of the Free (nobody gives a shit about Osama anymore) have given him cancer.
Are you happy now America?
Update: The US Bureau of Prisons has released a statement saying, "While the NY Post story is full of inaccuracies, and we can’t specifically address all of them, we can tell you that Bernie Madoff is not terminally ill, and has not been diagnosed with cancer." Good to have you back Bernie.
Madoff looks like my dad.