Bombshell in Riverdale

Jewdar is still reeling from the news coming out of Riverdale this morning–Archie is going to walk down the aisle with either Betty or Veronica. If all goes according to plan, Archie readers will be treated (ala Desperate Housewives and One Tree Hill) to a six-issue story-line set five years down the road in which Archie and Co. have graduated from college, and are set to be grown ups, and do what grown ups do. On the face of it, there’s no obvious connection for Jewdar to make (other than we’ve read a lot of Archies, and actually still find them strangely enjoyable, and that Archie Comics was run for years by MOT John Goldwater), but let us, as Jewdar readers are wont to do, look deeper.

For decades, Veronica–rich, spoiled, stylish, brunette, and brash–has been a virtual (if unintended) JAP nemesis to Betty’s sweet, blond, Middle American ubershiksa. So what will it mean if Veronica wins the affections of America’s most beloved gingy? We don’t know, and we presume that Archie will choose Betty anyway. But we wouldn’t be surprised if some nights while driving home late after work, Archie found himself taking the route that took him past the Lodge mansion..

What do you think?

About The Author

jewdar

The Tel Aviv-born, Milwaukee-bred Jewdar has a bachelors' from the University of Wisconsin, a Masters from NYU, and an Honorable Discharge from the US Army, where he spent two years as an infantryman in the 101st Airborne Division. He's the co-author of "The Big Book of Jewish Conspiracies", the Humor Editor of Heeb Magazine, and a watcher of TV. Smarter than most funny people, funnier than most smart people, he lives on the Lower East Side with his wife and two sons.

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