03 · Issue 3

Urban Kvetch: Lifegem

Lifegem From the creepily named “living memorial” industry, a Lifegem is a diamond created from the carbon ashes of your cremated loved one, available in assorted colors. I can hear it already—women crowing from Scarsdale to Boca: “Can’t we do something about those pesky burial laws? Dig up grandma, kill your uncle; there’s a tennis...

Urban Kvetch: “Ready-Made”

Ready-Made Here’s a fun remodeling project: 1. Take Ready-Made magazine, the young nesters’ guide to alterna-crafts. 2. Now retool the name for a rag that’s entirely about creating things that aren’t already made. 3. Wring out the writers’ list and apply at least a couple of writers who aren’t Caucasians, for Chrissakes. 4. Vigorously jostle...

Urban Kvetch: “You Don’t Have to be Jewish”

You Don’t Have to be Jewish …to get heartburn from this record. Considering that Jackie Mason is currently on Broadway with his seventh one-man show, there’s no reason why this comedy relic from the last millennium boasting hackneyed sketches like “Divorce, Kosher Style” and “Secret Agent, James Bondstein” shouldn’t find an audience. But it instills...

Urban Kvetch: Rabbis in Kilts

Rabbis in Kilts What fun-loving Orthodox rabbi doesn’t want to frolic around in a skirt every once in a while? You’ve got to give it up for these free-balling, wild and crazy Scotsmen. Malted whiskey, bagpipes, Sean Connery and peeks at the rabbi’s package when he plays on the monkey bars. L’chaim! SEMITIC ONE

Unholy Alliance

Remember the good old days when we wouldn‘t touch right-wing Plutocrats and Christian Fundamentalists with a 10-foot pole? Well, times have changed, and Esther Kaplan asks what to make of our new best buddy, George W.


We are sorry to inform you that blonde dye jobs, anorexia and waxing have been asked to leave the premises. Sara Press captures the sexy jewess in all her glory.

Shticky Situation

They say that all humor essentially comes from the ghetto, the scrap heap, the margins. So now that we‘ve arrived at the center, are we still funny? Joshua Neuman investigates.