Madoff May or May Not Have Roughed Up “Prison Wife”

An unnamed inmate, described as a “white male over sixty years old,” was put in his place on the prison yard by prisoner #61727-054, a.k.a. Bernie Madoff. Thankfully, Madoff and his age-appropriate rival were spotted hanging out the following day, apparently all made up. Like many others, I suspect this must have been a Beecher/Keller/OZ type of lover’s quarrel.

71-year-old Madoff was pushed on the prison yard after an argument over the stock market got too heated. But Bernie wasn’t going down like a punk, Nuh-Uh! The New York Post reports that Madoff “shoved back harder with both hands, causing his attacker to stumble.” What’s more, Bernie stood over his attacker, staring down his “in-house Ruth” until the bitch ran off. This earned Madoff serious street cred from the 20 other prisoners who witnessed the brawl. “I didn’t think he had it in him,” a fellow inmate said.

I have to ask, who’s next for a Madoff beat down? Does Herman, the old pedophile from Family Guy, share the same jail? Is Roman Polanski on his block?