07 · Issue 7

Urban Kvetch: Costa Rica

Costa Rica Now, I’ve got nothing against the people or even the land. The problem I have is with people who think they’re doing anything other than paying for the right to say they’re not at Miami Beach. You’re at a fucking Club Med, so drop the Indiana Jones routine. The closest you’re coming to...

Urban Kvetch: Over-eager Busboys

Over-eager busboys “Get away from our plates!” We don’t care if there are only morsels left. You know, in many places in the world it’s actually bad manners for a busboy to lurk and wait to snatch up your plate the second you’re done. Maybe some Americans can’t stand looking at their supersized portions any...

Urban Kvetch: Homies

Homies David Gonzalez says he created these one-inch tall plastic figurines with names such as “Big Vato,” “Dr. Bomba” and “El Grumpy” out of love, and we can only imagine that it was for the same reason that he created Palermos, a New York crime family with names like “Rocko the Trashman,” “No Problem Paulie”...

Urban Kvetch: Schnorrers at Yonah Schimmel’s Knishery

Schnorrers at Yonah Schimmel’s Knishery For crying out loud, this is like trying to win at three card monty. The house wins every time. Schimmel’s has been here since 1910. Do you really think that you are the first cheap Jew to walk into this place who’s schemed up a way to avoid tax and...

Urban Kvetch: Faux Mitzvahs

Faux Mitzvahs What’s the average American kid to do when his/her Jewish counterparts are having the bar/bat mitzvahs of the century? Have their parents throw a faux mitzvah

Urban Kvetch: JDate

JDate The Internet ad reads: “760,424 blue-eyed women at JDate.com and counting,” and another tallies green-eyed men. Is JDate encouraging us to JHate? Of course lots of Jews are light as can be. But with the stigma on the dark-complexioned putting us at odds with our swarthy Semitic selves, JDate ads offer a disturbing and...

Urban Kvetch: Anti-Anti Smokers

Anti-anti smokers Smokers are bad enough. But even worse are the vociferous groups (sometimes nonsmokers themselves!) that brand efforts to limit smoking as “fascist.” As long as I have to breathe your secondhand smoke in public places, this is not a First Amendment issue. And don’t call my train of thought “Orwellian.” Just for a...

Urban Kvetch: Gardens in Brooklyn

Gardens in Brooklyn People from Brooklyn always want to show you their gardens. “I could never afford this garden in Manhattan,” they tell me. Come on. Your garden is three square feet. You can’t fit four tomatoes in your garden. A dog took a crap in your garden and an ant stuck a flag in...

Rain Dances

_(excerpted from original article)_ “I’m black and a Jew—I swear I could spend years in therapy,” Rain Pryor says. “But what’s the point? I’d rather write about my life and perform it.” Pryor, the daughter of legendary comic Richard Pryor, exorcises her demons in her new solo show, _Fried Chicken & Latkes_. The cabaret-style performance,...

The Moral Minority

Sick and tired of the religious right? Meet the men and women increasingly organizing around progressive causes as people of faith. Anya Kamenetz reports on the religious left.

Out From Under

South Africa, 1936: A young German couple begins a strange new life in this excerpt from Shana Liebman's novel in progress, based on the experiences of her grandparents.

Once You Go JAP…

Joshua Rubin photographs five punk sirens as they straighten their hair, cut calories and construct themselves as capitalist subjects.